


Ebbing and flowing (and pushed by a breeze)

by Louie_writes



Series: Leave me your star dust (to remember you by) [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Like, M/M, Make up sex, Molesting, Pain Kink, Resolving Issues, Talking about your feelings, Uhm, bawling, call me out if i missed something, feels fest, hard core smut very explicit, i didn't mean to write praise kink but here we are, idk what else, like so many tears omg, mention of sexual assault, metion of molesting, okay so, or idk resollvement sex, very emotional and feelsysex, we're going over what happened in yet black again so watch out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-05-02 13:53:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19200199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Louie_writes/pseuds/Louie_writes
Summary: The final conclusion of the star dust series. Kenma and Kuroo talk shit out.----Yep, just dropping by, discussing regular things like Kenma’s sudden and destructive jealousy, the fact that he had chosen to be used as a fuck toy by random strangers that had used more force than strictly necessary and his lack of need to stop them, the fact that for about half a year his best friend’s name was a sore enough topic that his closest friends avoided saying it as much as possible. Casual stuff.





	Ebbing and flowing (and pushed by a breeze)

**Author's Note:**

> Title a lyric from Gregory and the Hawk's "Boats and Birds".
> 
> tis the conclusion to the series, enjoy it.

Kenma contemplated his life choices on his train to Kuro. When you looked out onto the city into the early evening sky it really invited you for in-depth introspection.

 

More specifically, he contemplated everything that happened at dinner the day before. It had happened so fast and all at once, he didn’t really get time to process it all.

 

“May I introduce you to my friends?” Kuro had said, and he meant it.

 

After the girls’ win they all went out to dinner to celebrate, and Kenma got to talk to the girls. He really hadn’t expected to like them as much as he did. He was aware that his perception of them was quite skewed in his destructive fit of jealousy. He knew though they were good people; after all, Kuro liked them and Kuro didn’t like bad people. He had expected to need a bit more time to adjust to them before he would fully invite them in his heart.

 

Halfway through dinner, though, he had been so coddled by them that the comment ‘feels like home here’ escaped him, and Kuro, next to him, had barked out his excessive hyena-laugh in response.

 

Kuro though—Kuro was a number in and of himself.

 

Kenma didn’t quite know if being near Kuro was comfortable or not. On one hand, it was awkward, they hardly talked outside of polite banter and the occasional borderline rude but nonetheless friendly jab. One the other hand, Kenma had noticed all through dinner that he had gravitated towards Kuro, and Kuro, likewise, had gravitated towards him.

 

They sat next to each other without discussing it, Kenma leaned onto his side towards Kuro more than strictly necessary, Kuro would talk to him more privately than truly required. Kuro reflexively followed Kenma when he got up to give Shohei his phone back after borrowing it, Kenma reflexively followed Kuro when he moved to get another drink, despite not wanting a drink himself.

 

Towards the end, the girl’s captain called them out on being in sync with a grin on her face, to which they both responded ‘no, we’re not’ at the same time, which made the entire table laugh.

 

And Kuro… Kuro was a difficult topic for Kenma overall. More than anything, Kenma wasn’t certain of his actual feelings for Kuro. He wanted him, truly. Being near him and hearing him, including the hyena-laugh that hurt his ears, was the water for which he thirsted. But thinking, feeling, decision making was HARD.

 

Being near Kuro again was like breathing. Natural. Necessary. Inevitable.

 

At the same time being near him was tense. Awkward, even. Kenma wasn’t used to this. He was used to being tense and awkward around people, but Kuro hadn’t been one of those people since they were children. It was weird, so weird.

 

Hence Kenma’s desire to talk things out with Kuro. It had been too late last night, and Kuro had to work the next day, but work was over now, and Kuro had said that it would be a good time to drop by.

 

Yep, just dropping by, discussing regular things like Kenma’s sudden and destructive jealousy, the fact that he had chosen to be used as a fuck toy by random strangers that had used more force than strictly necessary and his lack of need to stop them, the fact that for about half a year his best friend’s name was a sore enough topic that his closest friends avoided saying it as much as possible. Casual stuff.

 

His hands were getting sweaty with nerves. He breathed himself through an impending anxiety attack. Unsuccessfully.

 

The train intercom announced his station. He got up to get to the exit.

 

This station was actually quite popular, so in no time a crowd surrounded Kenma. The increasing lack of personal space frayed his nerves even more.

 

The train halted, and the announcer said there was an issue on the tracks that would delay their next stop by a few minutes. Silent, individual groaning and exasperated comments about being inconvenienced briefly filled the silence of the small crowd surrounding Kenma. He started shaking, he needed to get out, OUT! This place was too tight, to intimate, too—

 

There was a familiar pressure against his backside, the kind that told him this was an intentional move, not caused by the crowding.

 

A hand reached around his body, resting on his crotch and gripping a little.

 

Now  _ this _ was familiar, this was something Kenma could deal with. He could breathe again.

 

He ground into the hand on his pants. The action made him release a silent but freeing groan. No need to perform, or impress, or look inside of himself to understand his feelings, no need to be himself, he just needed to indulge in—

  
  


_ ’Nekoma’s brain doesn’t have to act like that.’ _

  
  


Damnit, damnit, damnit! He fucked up again!

 

He weaseled himself out of the grip of the person that had already half opened his pants and squeezed through the crowd of people, not looking back at whoever could have put their hands in his pants; he just got to another exit.

 

Damnit, damnit! So much on having changed, so much on not falling back on old habits!  One fucking second of weakness and he fucking indulged again, he had failed— 

  
  


_ ‘Nekoma’s brain doesn’t need to feel ashamed.’ _

  
  


He breathed through his hyperventilation. His inner Shohei voice was right. Recovery wasn’t linear—he was gonna fall back at some point either way, the only important thing was picking himself back up afterwards and moving forwards. No reason to make big drama about little issues.

 

The train put itself into motion again.

 

——

 

Kuro’s door opened in front of him. What a sight—Kenma swore Kuro became more attractive every time they met. It was somewhat hard to breathe with a view like that, and Kuro’s breath seems to be uneven as well. He indulged for a bit before he called Kuro out on being a bad host with all his staring.

 

Kuro jerked back to attention and invited him in.

 

Inside, Kuro asked if he already ate. Kenma said he did. Kuro offered him a drink with hot water, and mentioned that they could have tea since Kuro was going to make tea anyway so the water was already boiling and—

 

Kenma stopped him from rambling by agreeing to the drink.

 

Kuro went off to prepare the tea, and Kenma sat down in Kuro’s living area, awkwardly playing with his fingers. He felt unprepared for all of this.

 

After too long a time Kuro came back in, he had a whole tea set including pot and saucers and all, he put them down. Kenma watched him sit down, struggling with his knee still.

 

Kuro smiled at him, in honesty, it caught Kenma off guard somehow.

 

“So we haven’t talked in a while. How have you been?”

 

_ ‘Not good. We both know this,’ _ Kenma thought to himself. He took a deep breath to steady himself. He had a tight grip on the teacup in his hand.

 

“I did some stupid things I’m not proud of for reasons that did not call for such a reaction.”

 

He talked.

 

——

 

The first thing Kenma said caught Kuroo off guard.

 

“When you moved away I realised I was in love with you.”

 

_ What? Why? How? What tipped you off? How didn’t I know about this? _

 

In hindsight, his idea that he needed to  _ win Kenma over _ before the other would develop any sort of feelings for him was stupid. As always, Kenma was way better and faster than him, and most importantly, his own god damn person, and had developed feelings on his own before Kuroo had any chance to make a move.

 

Kuroo was burning with questions, a need for clarification but Kenma needed to talk, and Kuroo would let him.

 

“The first thing that really got to me was your recovery honestly.” Kenma chuckled, Kuroo failed to see the humour in the situation. “Watching you struggle was hard. Being incapable of helping was even harder, but— Kenma breathed out deeply and looked towards the ceiling, “—seeing you do well, having people other than me support you and make you happy—that was the worst.”

 

Kuroo was grateful for every single person in his life, especially early last year when he was doing so bad. Bo had helped, Yaku had helped, the girls had helped, and Kenma had helped. Kuroo didn’t quite get why this was so hard on Kenma.

 

“I had a sort of selfish desire to be important to you. To have an impact. After all, I was your best friend and—” A tear ran down Kenma’s face, and Kuroo clenched his fists to not wipe it away and interrupt Kenma’s flow of words, “—yet I failed to be there for you when you needed support the most.”  _ You didn’t fail, you were there for me, you were very important to me. Still are. _ “My role in your life was replaced.”

 

This hit Kuroo like a bucket of cold water to the face. Of course. Of course Kenma would struggle with that from a long distance! He gripped his mouth with his hand, hoping to all the deities out there that he would not start to sob before Kenma got to finish talking.

 

“Being replaced as a friend was bad. Something I figured would happen anyway, but then the way Kaede was around you—” Kaede. Kaede! Of course she would have sent some wrong signals with photos and messages like that! God Kuroo hated himself for it; after all he knew how often Kaede would cause an issue in another person’s relationship because she came across as too flirty. Yet, the same thing happened to his own. Despite the relationship not even starting. Damnit, Damnit! “—I gave up on having any sort of relationship whatsoever. You had better friends than me—”  _ Never! _ “—And you had a pretty love interest that was better than me in every way. I didn’t stand a chance. I struggled with it, but I didn’t break my phone until you taught Yue the time difference attack. That was  _ our _ thing, it was a symbol of our trust and long relationship. And you gave it away. And then you said she seemed like Tsukki, and I know how much you like Tsukki.” So wrong. So much he had done wrong, and he wasn’t even  _ half _ aware of it.

 

Kenma took a sip of his tea. His voice was starting to sound dry, even to Kuroo.

 

“I tried to distract myself from it all. From the change and the feelings and the uncertainty. Volleyball didn’t work and games didn’t quite hold my interest in the same way so I,” Kenma swallowed, Kuroo prepared for the worst, “I started uh, I…” Kenma closed his eyes “I started sleeping around.”

 

Kuroo was shell-shocked. Out of all the bad things to happen he hadn’t expected this. Self harm? Drugs maybe? This was not the Kenma he had in his mind. But he had been wrong about Kenma before, hadn’t he?

 

“It really worked, so I continued doing it so I could play volleyball as normal and go to class like a good student.” Kenma swallowed again. “First there was that guy from my parallel class,”  _ First… _ “Then a guy from another school that was at the same train stop as me. Another guy on a train, a university student this time. Then a businessman, on the train again.” Kenma chuckled lifelessly. “Seems like trains are good places to find creeps.”

 

So many, so many, so many, holy shit! They had only been separated for a year and already Kenma went that far to release his pain. Kuroo’s eyes hurt from having them so wide open in shock.

 

“With every single one of these guys there was always a point where they went too far. Before that happened, like a miracle, Shohei would show up,”  _ ‘I’m sorry I couldn’t do more’ _  “and get me out of there. But I—” Kenma swallowed once more starting to shake, “-I would have let them. I didn’t even think about stopping them.” 

 

Kuroo closed his eyes then, dropped his face into his clenching and shaking hands.  _ Hold it together, boy, he’s not done yet, he’s not done… _

 

“After that last trip, Shohei called me out on  _ just wanting to replace you _ , and how inefficient that was. I tried to hit him for it. He caught my hand, though. After that we were on our way to recovery.” Kenma drank some more tea. He wasn’t shaking anymore, which was good. Kuroo shook severely in his stead.

 

“It took me a while to come back, truly back though. After some time, I would regularly meet up with Shohei and Tora, do my hair, hang out, have a social life. I even talked to Shoyou again.” 

 

Tears were streaming down Kuroo’s face now unhindered. He kept his face buried in his hands, tried to keep as silent as possible as to not interrupt Kenma. 

 

Kenma drank his tea again, then chuckled through his tears. “The weirdest thing happened when you sent me the picture of the science ball. We were at Tora’s place to watch movies and I was doing good. I was doing so well. And then you sent me that damn picture of the hottest woman I had ever seen in my life being your ball date. And not only that, but you were friends, she was as smart as you, and she liked your passion as much as you did. I was so consumed—” Kenma made a repulsed face at that, “—by jealousy that I threw my phone away again and moved over to make out with Shohei.”

 

Kuroo looked up then. He certainly hadn’t expected  _ that _ one.

 

“Yea honestly, thinking back I’m having the same reaction,” Kenma said, in response to Kuroo’s shocked face, his own face still wet but with a big grin on it nonetheless. “He helped me through it, though. I still hear his support sometimes, and I got the opportunity to move on. And Aggretsuko is a pretty good show by the way.” 

 

Now even Kuroo chuckled through his tears.

 

“Volleyball was fun again, I was looking forward to nationals, I planned which university to go to, and it didn’t even bother me all too much that you were at it.” 

 

Kuroo closed his eyes again, a fond smile slowly spreading across his face. This was the Kenma he knew and loved. 

 

“Then I saw you at the bakery, and we went to your game, and I think I realised then that you didn’t actually want to date any of the girls. I wasn’t replaced, you were just friends, and still willing to see me. I had just overreacted.” Kenma put his empty cup back down on the saucer. “And now we’re here,” he finished and gestured with his hands awkwardly. 

 

Kuroo couldn’t hold back tears anymore, finally able to speak. “I’m so proud of you,” he said with conviction. Through his watery vision he saw Kenma jerk, but not enough details of his face to identify his exact reaction.

 

“I knew—I always knew you were strong. So strong and so amazing. I failed you as a friend, I wasn’t—I wasn’t there for you when you needed me the most, hell—” he sobbed but continued on, “—I was the one that caused you such immeasurable pain. But you got yourself out of it, on your own. And now you’re here and thriving and more beautiful than ever.”

 

He wiped the tears off of his face, his vision clearing up. He took Kenma’s hand into his own and said with the biggest smile on his face, “You are amazing and beautiful and I am  _ blessed _ that I get to talk to you. Let alone to have you return my feelings.” A gasp from Kenma, as if those feelings for the other hadn’t been obvious since day one. “And after all that I have put you through, to have you come to me again, and willing to speak to me.”

 

“Kuro…”

 

Kuroo shook his head, he wasn’t done, and the tears weren’t done streaming out of him. He squeezed Kenma’s hand and said, “I’ve been hopelessly in love with you since I was twelve. And there was never anyone else. Not Kaede, not Bo, not Tsukki, not that hot manager I had in first year, no one.”

 

Kenma started to sob again then, tears streaming down his face again. Kuroo had to laugh.

 

“Look at us,” Kuroo said laughing, but still crying like a waterfall, “crying babies.”

 

Kenma laughed through his tears as well. “We’re both stupid.”

 

“Very stupid,” Kuroo agreed, laughing and crying more. He looked at Kenma then, looked at the watery outline of his face. He released the others hands to instead gently grasp his jaw. Run his fingers over the others cheeks. He pulled the face closer, to lean their foreheads against one another. Just resting, breathing, letting the tears dry. There was no reason to cry anymore.

 

“I missed you,” Kenma said, in the quietest voice.

 

“I missed you too, Kitten.” Kuroo responded, barely keeping his voice from breaking.

 

They just stayed there, for a moment. Letting their faces rest against each other, calming down after everything that happened. Indulging.

 

“Kuro?” Kenma asked in that quiet voice again. Kuroo hummed encouragingly. Not opening his eyes, but smiling in content. “Can I kiss you?” That made him open his eyes.

 

Kenma’s face was so close to him that he had to lean back a bit to look at it properly. Kenma’s eyes were impossibly big and bright. Shiny, still, from having cried. Kuroo couldn’t deny him any request.

 

“Please do,” he said, hands still on Kenma’s face, eyes still open as they neared each other again gently, as if rushing things now would make the moment burst like a bubble.

 

Kenma’s lips brushed his, just barely. There wasn’t a jolt, there was no special taste or anything. But he could tell that Kenma’s lips were soft and shy, in their hesitance still asking for permission, as if he would ever need permission to kiss Kuroo. Kuroo pushed their faces closer, kissing the other with intent.

 

There was a taste now. Home. Rightness. Success.

 

God it was clumsy, and both of them hurt their lips on their teeth. Kuroo swore he would bleed soon, but by god he didn’t want it to end.

 

He leaned further into the kiss, pushing Kenma backwards into his seat. The other released a high gasp that gave Kuroo all sorts of butterflies. 

 

Kuroo leaned back again, looking at Kenma’s face in his hands. Lips red and swollen, cheeks rosy, eyes sparkling. Not from barely dried tears this time, but from desire.

 

“Another.” Kenma whispered.

 

“Always.” Kuroo responded, leaning back in.

 

Kenma wrapped his arms around Kuroo’s neck now, hands wandering into his hair, a tight grip in it as if he feared this moment would end, as if Kuroo would ever go away. Kuroo chuckled against the other’s lips at that thought, and the invalidity of it, and let his hands move from the others face to his waist, where he gripped him and pulled Kenma onto his lap, leaning back looking up into the others face.

 

Kenma gasped in surprise at being moved, eyes unfocused as if he was a bit dizzy, but once seated the focus came back to them.

 

“This is different,” Kenma whispered. The little air between them was tense, the air around them non-existent. “It never felt like this before, this is different.”

 

Kuroo grinned. “I knew I would be your best lay yet.”

 

Kenma grinned back at him. “I never said  _ that _ .” And leaned back down to kiss him again.

 

Kissing him, feeling up his waist with his hands, groaning against his lips had Kenma’s hips starting to rotate. He was getting dizzy, lost in the haze of it all, losing orientation in the taste and smell of Kenma on him, in him, surrounding him. Loving him.

 

“You never kissed before, right?” Kenma asked, just barely moving back. Kuroo could still feel the others lips move against his own as he spoke, which did terrible things to his concentration and language comprehension.

 

“No, this is my first time,” Kuroo responded, his lips moving against Kenma’s, his voice deeper than he remembered it being.

 

“That means you also never did  _ this _ before,” the little minx said, grinding with  _ intention _ into his lap.

 

Kuroo groaned and nodded affirmatively. Was that the correct response?

 

“And you never did  _ this _ before,” the minx said again, leaning down to Kuroo’s throat, biting it with intent. Kuroo did his own share of grinding then, groaning loudly, which invited Kenma to bite again.

 

“And you also,” Kenma continued against his throat, running his teeth along it as he spoke, “never did  _ this _ ,” his hands moved under Kuroo’s shirt, running up his sides and even further up his back, “before.” Nails scratching down his back.

 

“Holy shit!” Kuroo cursed, hips bucking up into Kenma. He saw the little fucker grinning above him when he found his focus again. Adorable little fucker who should grin like this all the time but a little fucker nonetheless.

 

“Found what you like,” the little fucker said in a voice that matched his grin.

 

“You just keep talking,” Kuroo panted, “your grin will leave you when I—when I find  _ your _ weaknesses.”

 

“Pull my hair,” Kenma responded without hesitation.

 

“What?”

 

Kenma pulled a hair clip out of his updo. Golden locks fell over his shoulder. Kuroo gaped in awe, suddenly feeling like he was living a fairytale.

 

“Pull my hair if you want me to lose it.” Kuroo swallowed. “Why do you think I grew it out?” Okay so comments like that matched with that sort of grin were NOT fairytale like, but VERY MUCH to Kuroo’s taste so he went in for the kill.

 

Abruptly pulling the other’s hair, forcing his head back, moving in to lick the others throat.

 

Kenma gasped in a high voice, followed by saying his name in the same sort of tone.

 

Kuroo moved Kenma’s head to where he wanted to, sucking hickeys into the exposed throat in front of him. Kenma started to grind with intention again, shaky whimpers leaving him as Kuroo assaulted his throat.

 

One hand free, Kuroo used the opportunity to do his own exploration on Kenma’s skin. He always had a weak spot for the others’ stomach, running his hand over the expanse of it, smooth, tense, and moving jerkily with uneven breaths.

 

Kuroo released Kenma’s hair to have his other hand move under the shirt as well, both hands resting on wonderful skin. He took a deep breath to collect himself again.

 

“Can I take this off?” he asked Kenma, lifting the shirt a little with his question.

 

“Please,” Kenma responded, voice high and uneven, eyes glassy staring up to the ceiling.

 

In a collective effort, they got Kenma topless. Kuroo’s mouth went dry as his eyes and hands explored the smooth and wonderful stomach and chest in front of him.

 

“I want to mark you,” Kuroo told Kenma, looking straight into his eyes. Kenma bit his lip and nodded enthusiastically, as if incapable of speech. His eyes never left Kuroo’s face.

 

Permission granted, Kuroo reverted his vision back to the beautiful sight in front of him. There was so much he was eager to do that it took him a moment to decide. He gingerly ran his fingers from Kenma’s hip bones over his stomach to his ribs. Kenma shook and twitched in his lap, and an ever present grinding motion happened with the others’ hips. Kuroo knew Kenma was ticklish, especially in his sides and stomach, so the gentle hands had probably triggered that, even if lightly. Going by the intense gaze, gentle shake, and prominent erection though it was not quite a problem. 

 

His fingers ran higher over Kenma’s chest, stopping to play with the others’ nipples. No significant reaction, not an erogenous zone then. Well he could further explore this another night, right now he had a mission, he just needed to find a place to start…

 

His hands moved ever higher, finding the prominent collar bone. Kuroo had always had a weakness for that, finding days when Kenma would wear deep collared or too big clothing to be among the most pleasant, eyes always straying to the distracting view.

 

He ran his thumbs along the bone structure until he gripped Kenma tightly by the shoulder, moving in to go for another bite.

 

Sucking. Biting. Moving on.

 

Sucking. Biting. Moving on.

 

Sucking. Biting. Moving on.

 

Kuroo leaned back, admiring the view. The red of Kenma’s cheeks almost matched the red of the hickey’s now on his throat and collar.

 

“ _ Kuro… _ ” Kenma said, gasping. Kuroo grinned, time to move on.

 

His hands moved down to the bottom of Kenma’s ribs, pulling the other up onto his knees more to make access to his chest easier. Kenma went along willingly, even if his legs were shaking like a leaf in the autumn wind.

 

Kuroo licked, nibbled, and sucked on Kenma’s chest, Kenma releasing groans and sighs at the ministrations. Soon Kenma would be more red than white skin. A piece of art, more so than usual even.

 

Kuroo’s hands wandered down to Kenma’s hips, pulling him up even more, acquiring better access to the other’s stomach.

 

Grip tight, he went in to bite the little piece of loose skin around Kenma’s navel. The act got him a loud shout of  “Tetsuro!” as well as desperate hands shooting into his hair, gripping tight, and crazy strong rotations of the others hips that desperately tried to find friction in the thin air.

 

Now  _ that _ was the kind of reaction he was hoping for. Kuroo would have laughed at Kenma’s desperation if he wasn’t so fucking turned on himself. Busy marking Kenma’s stomach and hips with signs of desire and possession. Kenma grinding his hips so much it almost became an issue, and releasing a constant, breathless stream of  “Tetsuro, Tetsuro, Tetsuro…”

 

He nibbled from the sternum down the stomach over the navel to the happy trail, fully intending to open the others pants for better access but his hands were stopped.

 

“I want—” Kenma said breathlessly, staring right at him, “I want you naked too.”

 

Kuroo dropped his forehead against Kenma’s now thoroughly marked stomach. Kenma couldn’t just  _ say _ things like that and not expect him to cream his pants immediately.

 

But who was he to deny a minx like that a request though.

 

He pushed Kenma off his lap, back into the seat he had sat in before. He stood up to undress himself, Kenma’s ever attentive eyes boring right into him. They moved down to his damaged knee when he tried to change his weight distribution and winced at the pain. The eyes shot straight back up, though, to see if he was fine. He pulled the last of his clothes off and threw them away into the void outside of their personal bubble.

 

“Now you,” he said, standing naked and proud and hard as a rock in front of Kenma.

 

Kenma licked his lips in a genuinely pornographic display and got up quicker than Kuroo had ever seen him move, removing his pants so fast that Kuroo barely caught sight of the action.

 

They just stood there, naked, and hard, in front of each other, looking into each others eyes.

 

Tension snapped as Kenma shot up into his face again, kissing him vigorously. After five whole moments Kenma released him again, and pushed him backwards onto the couch Kuroo had previously sat on.

 

“My turn,” Kenma said, dropping to his knees between Kuroo’s legs and getting to work himself.

 

Delicately, but nonetheless eager he reached for Kuroo’s fingers, feeling them up and down.

 

“These fingers,” he said, his voice shaking, “have been on my  _ mind _ .” He ran his lips along them. “On me,” he kissed the tips of them, “around me,” he took two of them into his mouth, pushing them deep into his throat and pulling them out again, “ _ in me. _ ”

 

Kuroo groaned with a bass that his entire body felt.

 

Kenma then moved to kiss the inside of his palms. “Your hands have been on my mind, certainly,” he said, moving on to kiss the inside of Kuroo’s wrists, “but so have your arms.” Gentle bites and kisses interchanged as Kenma moved up them.

 

“It’s true that I didn’t always  _ know _ that I was attracted to you,” a bite into Kuroo’s biceps, Kuroo groaning again and rolling his eyes back, leaning his head against the couch because he wasn’t strong enough to look Kenma in the eyes when at work, “but I  _ was _ always  _ appreciative _ . After all,” he ran his teeth over Kuroo’s shoulder to his collarbone as he spoke, “it’s hard not to be with a best friend like you.” He scratched Kuroo’s arm with intent there.

 

“Holy shit!” Kuroo cursed, hips bucking off the couch, hitting against Kenma’s own hips. The pleasure was incredible, coursing through him from the tips of his fingers to his curled up toes. But more importantly, the tension in his body did something terrible.

 

“Time out, time out.” He said, hissing in pain. 

 

Kenma flinched off him. “Did I do something wrong?”

 

“No, no, just,” Kuroo assured him, “cramp.” He held the damaged knee, radiating immense pain. Kenma eyed the issue at hand from where he kneeled between Kuroo’s legs. Kuroo could see the gears working behind his eyes. Technically, the cramp came up because the scratch on his arms had been so good, but he didn’t want Kenma to make that sort of connection and get insecure in their little play.

 

“I can fix that,” Kenma said with determination, licking his lips again. He looked at Kuroo’s face, asking for permission. Kuroo nodded lightly and leaned back against the couch again, leaving his painful knee in Kenma’s attentive care. The movement made him hiss a little, but he barely noticed it as he tried to figure out what had happened in Kenma’s brain.

 

Kenma gently lifted Kuroo’s leg onto his shoulder, damaged and painful knee resting right beside his face. He gently ran his hands over the side of Kuroo’s knee, and up and down his thigh, all the while wisely avoiding the damaged cap, and looking at Kuroo’s face for any sign of distress.

 

Kuroo himself was captivated by the intense gaze in Kenma’s eyes, as he tended to be, and enthralled by the gentle ministrations of Kenma’s hands on his painful leg. Eager to see what the other had in mind, he gestured for him to continue on.

 

“You know,” Kenma started in the same voice as before, digging the palms of his hands more deeply into Kuroo’s thigh. Kuroo hissed and gasped at the same time, but urged Kenma to continue on.

 

“It wasn’t just your fingers and arms that were on my mind, Kuro.” He moved the palm of his hands all along Kuroo’s thigh, kneading the meat much like a cat would for preparing its bed, gingerly moving closer to the tense knee. An effective massage for his leg. “It was your legs as well.” He dug in with his fingers, close to where the pain in his knee was the worst. The action made Kuroo hiss, but he was still eager to see this continue on. Kenma was going to make him develop a pain kink at this rate. Well, there were worse things to have a thing for. God he was smitten. 

 

“They’re hard to miss being that long.” Kenma’s hands turned gentler, running up Kuroo’s thigh and down to the sore part of the knee again. “And strong.” Same thing but with more pressure in the fingertips. “And so  _ hot _ when you squat.” He dug his thumbs with  _ intent _ into the sore part of the knee, almost too close to the injury. God it hurt, it hurt so much but Kuroo could only gasp at the ministration and his dick twitched with interest.

 

Kenma’s eyes sparkled, and he continued massaging the sides of Kuroo’s knee with the tips of his fingers, but gentler than the sort he used at first.

 

“This okay?” Kenma asked him, losing none of his confidence. Kuroo could do nothing but nod. Cock dripping with pre-come, hips gently gyrating with interest. 

 

Kenma continued his massage for a few more moments. Kuroo’s knee genuinely felt better, he even got to move it properly. Kenma noticed the improvement and kissed the knee before gently rubbing his cheeks against it like a particularly affectionate cat. Despite his all consuming lust, Kuroo couldn’t help but feel soft and endeared somehow.

 

Kenma then moved his hands to the other, healthy but currently neglected leg, to massage Kuroo’s thigh there.

 

“You know,” he started. Kuroo’s swallowed to prepare for the impending sweet talk attack that was likely to go directly to his groin again. Kenma kissed the healthy knee as well before continuing on. “I think—” He lifted Kuroo’s leg to kiss the underside of it. “—volleyball and its uniform,” he lowered the leg again to nibble along the inside of his thigh, enclosing on his crotch, “were specifically invented,” he rubbed Kuroo’s healthy thigh up and down with intent, “for people to develop,” he whispered against the healthy knee, teeth grazing against his skin as he continued, “ _ leg fetishes. _ ” He bit into the flesh. 

 

Kuroo groaned and wrung and cursed around Kenma’s name.

 

One hand on each thigh, Kenma slid along the inside of his legs, closing in on the dead centre of Kuroo’s body. “You know what else has been on my mind for a while?”

 

Both hands now surrounding Kuroo’s aching cock,  _ so close _ but not touching yet. Kuroo closed his eyes to not nut immediately, trying to breathe through it all, but finding it hard to find air in all the tension.

 

Delicately, as if shy, Kenma’s fingertips moved up Kuroo’s cock. Making it twitch with the delicacy of his ministrations, and getting caught in the pre-come there. If Kuroo hadn’t been so turned on it may have tickled.

 

Kuroo’s weak gasp must have solidified Kenma’s confidence because his hands moved up and down Kuroo’s cock with more intent. Twisting and turning and smearing pre-come everywhere, almost painful in their eagerness.

 

Kuroo couldn’t give less of a fuck about potential pain with his strong desire to come, gyrating his hips into Kenma’s hands and repeating his name with every thrust.

 

“Now this,” Kenma said, lips touching the head of Kuroo’s cock, “I certainly having been thinking about for a while.” With that line he closed his lips around the head, sucking with determination.

 

“Fuck.” Kuroo burst out with all his soul, bucking up into the wet heat of Kenma’s mouth. 

 

Instead of getting any sort of protest he got a deep hum in response, followed by more thorough ministrations as Kenma’s head moved along Kuroo’s cock, from the tip of his head to the very root of it, again and again.

 

Despite his best efforts, Kuroo couldn’t keep his hips from thrusting into Kenma’s mouth, and the consistent, deep hum vibrating through his cock from the other’s throat wasn’t helping matters.

 

Crazy, crazy, crazy he was going with the heat. One hand on the couch next to him for support, the other on the back of Kenma’s head to hold him in place, barely noticing that his thrusts had turned eager, less gentle.

 

A repetitive string of curses and Kenma’s name left him as he thrust into Kenma’s throat with intent, slowly losing hold and grasp of reality as he finished.

 

With a shout of Kenma’s name he came, unclenching his hands, and falling back into the couch.

 

He took a moment to come back to consciousness, looking at the mess he made of Kenma, still kneeling between his legs. 

 

He leaned forward. “Are you okay?” he asked with a raspy voice. “Did I go too hard?”

 

“This,” Kenma said, looking between his hands and somewhere on Kuroo’s stomach, “is different as well.”

 

“Kenma,” he urged, “how are you?”

 

Kenma looked at him. Hands vibrating a little, lips wet and swollen, something that might have been come leaking over them, mouth ajar. His cheeks were still rosy and he breathed deeply and his eyes looked at Kuroo with an intensity that made him swallow, his hair a mess, it made him truly look like a  _ wreck _ .

 

“I’m  _ amazing _ ,” he answered with certainty.

 

Kuroo breathed out. Glad that he didn’t mess up or hurt his boyfriend in the heat of the moment.

 

_ Boyfriend _ . Felt odd, but made him giddy. Well it’s not like they had decided on terms, but that was an issue for another time. 

 

“Alright then, little rascal,” Kuroo said, leaning back again, “come here.” He slapped a hand on his thigh invitingly.

 

With the speed of an eager bean Kenma moved up into Kuroo’s lap, looking at his face excitedly. Kuroo put a hand on Kenma’s hip, and the other on his jaw. He was lucky, so lucky.

 

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he said with a big smile before moving in and making out vigorously.

 

Every kiss with Kenma was better than the last. Probably because their individual skills improved over time, or because they got used to each other more. Didn’t matter.

 

Kuroo could taste the aftermath of his own ejaculation in Kenma’s mouth. Objectively speaking a terrible taste, but since it was the flavour of their previous actions and impending relationship he couldn’t help but love it.

 

After two moments, he moved the hand from Kenma’s hip down to his groin, gripping him tightly in his hands. Kenma gasped at finally being touched there, and they stopped their kissing for the most part, even if their lips still touched.

 

Kuroo didn’t even have to do much, little movements of his hands made Kenma go crazy with lust, moving his hips into the tight hold of Kuroo’s grip, panting Kuroo’s name against his lips.

 

“Tetsuro…” Kenma gasped. Kuroo hadn’t expected that the sound of his given name would suddenly be a turn on for him. “I need to come please, Tetsu…”

 

“Come for me then, Kitten,” Kuroo said against the others’ lips, voice deeper than he had intended.

 

Kenma moaned in a high voice, and shot his come all over Kuroo’s chest and stomach.

 

After a moment, he sat calmly on Kuroo’s legs, leaning back a little as if to appreciate the view of the mess he made.

 

A soft ‘so different’ escaped Kenma as he looked at Kuroo’s torso with wide eyes and parted lips, and Kuroo couldn’t help but burst with affection.

 

“I love you so much.” He said with all his heart.

 

Kenma smiled sweetly, leaning into the hand that was still on his jaw and said, “I love you too, idiot.”

**Author's Note:**

> due to popular demand there is an update/ conlusion now. i hope yall got to enjoy the ride and got the conclusion yall were hoping for.
> 
>  
> 
> that "there was never anyone other than you (lists people that he has lots of chemistry with)" made me feel incredibly guilty XD so i jsut wanna give a shout out to all kuroo x someone other than kenma shippers. this was not supposed to be trash talk, jsut a line that is appropiate to use within the context of that particualr universe
> 
> not that i would look much like a kuroo x someone other than kenma hater given that i have a very long ongoing kurotsukki fic running, but still
> 
> so i hope yall had a good time and go tell someone you lvoe them and have a nap and drink something. love ya <3


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